Finding the flow isn't always easy, especially as an adult. We get caught up in "shoulds" and deadlines and other people's expectations of us and it is then that we lose the flow. It's when we think that our created human world trumps nature and its natural patterns and cycles that we lose it. And often when we think we are in it, it is our ego telling us what we want to hear. It's easy to be fooled about flow once we lose the ability to feel it so naturally as children do.
Children naturally follow the flow- they exist in that timeless state that mystics and physicists all talk about- they innately know what flow is deep in their bones. They follow their own patterns and time lines and when we work to speed them up or slow them down, children naturally resist. Even as babies- I keep hearing from my mama friends from birth class "The baby only takes a long nap when we have somewhere to go!" or "It takes forever to get out of the house now- I'm always late!" It's been the same here, with my child: I always hated those people who ran late, and now I am one of them. When we first brought Rowan home, we were amazed at the passage of time. The days zipped by as we cuddled in our blissful cocoon and we lost track of what day it was. My partner wrote as his Facebook status then, "Babies EAT time."
Because after all, we don't live in that kind of world do we? I'm talking about a world where we can trust and listen to our own bodies as the final arbiter of what is right for us personally. We do not live there! Most of us base when we eat and sleep (the two main things that determine our bodies rhythms) on an outside influence- such as when we have to be at work or when someone else gives us permission to do so.
We live in such a state of disconnection to the flow as the norm, that we get angry when our children follow it! "They are being disruptive to a 'normal' and/or 'productive' life", we think to ourselves. To which Zen Master Mary Jaksch and I reply, "What could be more 'productive' than producing another human being?" What could be more normal, more mindful, than living with your child, in the present?
|Photo credit: Nezdoiminoga|